Ponderings on Death

Did you ever think, as the hearse rolls by, that you might be the next to die?

They put you in a big black box, and cover you up with dirt and rocks

And all goes well for about a week, and then your coffin begins to reek...

The worms crawl in, the worms crawl out, the worms play pinochle on your snout

They eat your clothes, they eat your hat... they crawl in skinny and crawl out fat...

"The Hearse Song" (Lake Wobegon version... I think).

Most of us don’t like taking time pondering death.  It’s the one thing that every single person on the planet shares:  Our mortal experience has an inevitable end, and most of us aren’t exactly looking forward to it.

But, being the weird person I am, I have oftentimes wondered just how my ticket was going to be punched:  Would I die in an accident?  Would I die of a heart attack, or stroke… or maybe brain cancer?  Or would I die of health complications that would slowly, little by little destroy me inside and out?

And what do we fear about death… that it is the “great unknown”, or the separation from all that we know and love?

I can see any of those dying scenarios playing out… I really can.  I’m hoping it’s not the long, drawn-out death from illness… I absolutely loathe the idea of being a burden (especially financially) to my loved ones.

Though I can’t tell you how I will die, I can list off a few ways I probably won’t die:  

I will not die of suicide.  

I’ve had a fairly shitty past 6 months; a lot of moments where I just wanted to cease to exist.  But I was failing to see all of the good and wonderful things I’ve been blessed with because one very significant loss was eclipsing everything else for quite a while.  I know what it’s like to hit rock bottom, and to have pain and darkness be your companion day in and day out… you just want the pain to end!  But ending the pain doesn’t have to involve killing yourself… it can be accomplished by changing your perspective.  Is it easy and quick?  Hell no!  Is it worth it?  Hell yes!  

Life is such a miracle, such a blessing. Pain and darkness do not deserve the power they exercise over us. Each person on this earth is worth more than any of us can comprehend... greatness lies in everybody's potential, whether they choose to pursue and attain it or not. You are nothing less than amazing.

Other ways I *probably* will not die include:

• Being lost in space
• Getting eaten by a polar bear
• Vegetable overdose
• trampled in a giraffe stampede
• on a carnival ride
• drinking hemlock
• etc., etc., etc.  The list could literally go on forever.  And that gave me an idea:

As an entertaining hobby, I’m going to start writing some “No-bituaries”:  

Fictional death notices involving myself, a random location and an unlikely cause of death.  I hope you enjoy reading them as much as I enjoy writing them  :)